I molested 6 butterflies tonight
farters have to be the big spoon...
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
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