Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
