I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
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