That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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