Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
