You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
