I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
why is half of my head shaved?
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
