sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
