one two three fourrrrnication!
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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