ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
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