gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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