Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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