who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Randomize
