Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just googled if crying burns calories
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Randomize