I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
