mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize