just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize