U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
