nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
should my penis look like a turkey
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
