I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize