i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
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He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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