are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize