just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
