so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
