why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Randomize