yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize