What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
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