it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
I just blew my weed a kiss
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
