The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Randomize
