Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
