on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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