I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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