i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
