Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
We need to rekindle our bromance
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
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