I need to stop coming to work sober
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
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i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
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