my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
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