whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
