JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
