Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
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