Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
