Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
