He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize
