3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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