why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
i think im in europe. pls send help
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
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