You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
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he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
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Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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