Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
