I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
That accounts for only three of the penises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize