oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
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