I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Randomize
