3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
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