I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
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